Phaljames: 2012

Thursday, 24 May 2012

Written on Friday, 7 May 2010 at 19:03 •

I love u more dan the Nigerian police love N20.

I love u more dan the federal government love to owe workers.

I love u more dan the Nigerian politicians like 2 embezzle public funds

I love you more dan Raggae musicians like to take ganja

Written on Sunday, 9 May 2010 at 10:17 •

Out of the thousands of friends have had since have been born,i wouldn't forget TWO of them so quickly because of dere immense love for their father(s).

One said sometime dat she HATES her mother so much that she could kill her.I marvelled at dis statement cos it contradicts mine which is: 'I love my mum so much that i can do anything because of her'

The fact that some mothers could act like 'militants' can't be ruled out really,but i just do think dat shouldn't warrant any sort of hatred for such a mother.

Out of d billion mothers in the world 2day,dere is actually just one EMERITUS PROFESSOR OF MOTHERHOOD,and that is ..........

MY MUM

What Life in Paradise Will Be Like

Written on Tuesday, 11 May 2010 at 17:35 •

*Resurrection of the dead

*No more sickness,old age or death.

At that time,the eyes of d blind ones will be open,AIDS patient will be healed etc

*Plenty of good things to eat.

This is one thing am so interested in.

There will come 2b plenty of grain on the earth;on the top of d mountains there will be an overflow-Psalm 72:16

*Suitable homes & enjoyable work for all.

*No more crime,violence or war

*Freedom from fear,and peace everywhere.

May we all get there!!

Written on Saturday, 15 May 2010 at 14:16 •

Now,they would say 'What a man can do,a woman can do better'

Cheap lie it is.

Ok,perhaps its not a lie,i think they mean things like

1..Wearin trousers and makin the act of wearing skirts go into extinction.

Now,they truely do wear trousers more dan us.Ok, 'What a man can do,a woman can do better' sails through here.

Should we propose guys start using Lip sticks,wear skirts, etc?

Nope,we needn't do all these,we are naturally coded to do better dan the women.

Wouldn't women just accept these facts?

OK,Tell the women to PEE while standing upright

Written on Saturday, 29 May 2010 at 07:15 •

Its 11 yrs of Democracy in Nigeria.Did i hear u say u can't see its dividends?

The list is actuali around us & endless.How about:

The increasing rate in corruption.

Judicial flaws and incapacilities.

Billions in foreign accounts of our congress men(Politicians).

Political killings.And d list goes on and on and on.

Ok,wat more can we ask for?

11 years isn't little to get things so stabilized,but some people just have to go before things can get beta.Am not being a pessimist here,but it actually may take much longer b4 things get beta.

Written on Thursday, 10 June 2010 at 11:57 •

This note is an accumulation of personal experiences and stories have heard.

Women would say::::"Yes,other girls do it,but am different from them.."

One thing that makes me marvel is the fact that ladies talk and reason so much alike, as in a LADY in Nigeria will talk and reason thesame way a lady in Afganistan would without knowing each other.

Can't ladies come out of that shell which we know them to be?

A DEAD MAN:Is one who thinks dere is any different lady somewhere.

Its just quite disappointing that somehow,they can't be done without.

FROM SOKOTO to CALIFONIA to LONDON to AFGANISTAN,Ladies won't stop being ladies...

Written on Saturday, 19 June 2010 at 13:44 •

Igbo soup:This is one thing capable of changing my mood from BAD to GOOD.It's quite amazing how Igbo's come up with dese Soup(s),that is quite typical of them.Am not so surprised though,they spend lots of money on dis.I just might end up marrying an Igbo woman just because of this.Sorry my Yoruba girl that am drifting away,u know what to do to have my 80% love back.

Written on Friday, 2 July 2010 at 14:23 •

It pains me wen i see people suffer.

I wish poverty cld be eradicated completely 4rm dis land.

This is a country where there are billionaires,millionaires,yet dere are still a whole lot of people that live on less than a dollar per day.Lord,make me who i want to be cos THE WORLD AROUND ME NEEDS ME!!

Written on Tuesday, 3 August 2010 at 06:59 •

E don reach tym wey we, as

origina 9ja pples go stop 2 dey

use abbreviations like LOL, LMAO,

LMAOROTF, BRB, WAS, etc.

When we fit dey use abbreviation

for our own exceptional street

lingua.

Behold them:

1] LWKM - laugh wan kill me.

2] LWKMD - laugh wan kill me

die.

3] MIDG - make I dey go.

4] WGYL - we go yarn later.

5] IGA - I gbadun am.

6] ICS - I can't shout.

7] DJM - don't jealous me.

8] WBDM - who born the maga.

9] UDC - u dey craze.

10] NUS - na u sabi.

11] WSU - who send u.

12] OSABZ - over sabi.

13] ITK - I too know.

14] WDH - wetin dey happen.

15] NDH - nothin dey happen.

16] FMJ - free me jo.

17] BBP - bad bele people.

18] HUD - how u dey.

19] WKP - waka pass.

20] BBG - baby girl.

21] KKL - kokolette.

22] MML - mamalette.

23] GFF - gbono fele fele (e.g.

She GFF).

24] NTT - na true talk.

25] IKU - it koncain u?

26] NDM - no dull me.

27] LGT - let's goo there.

28] IFSA - I for slap am.

29] IGDO - I go die o.

30] YB - yess boss.

31] NLT - no long thing.

32] 2GB - 2 gbaski (e.g, d song

2GB!).

33] CWJ - carry waka jorh.

34] WBYO - wetin be ur own.

35] U2DW - u 2 dey worry.

36] U2DV - u 2 dey vex.

37] MKG - maka gini.

38] WSDP - who send dem papa.

39] INS - I no send.

40] NWO - na wa oo.

41] NMA - no mind am.

42] MIHW - make I hear word.

43] NBL - no be lie.

44] NB - na beans?

45] INFS - I no fit shout.

46] WWY - who wan yarn.

47] NBST - no be small thing.

48] WD - wetin dey.

49] UNGKM - u no go kill me.

50] O2S - omo 2 sexy.

51] DDDD - dey dere dey dull.

So, no DDDD read learn and use

them

Written on Saturday, 5 February 2011 at 18:32 •

I have never for once doubted the fact that God is a white man.The reason for this is actually because of how orderly and organised things are done there(abroad).I need not travel abroad before seeing these things,the movies i see speak volume of it all.I saw a movie recently,a woman actually mistakenly called 911,on realizing that,she hung up,immediately, the 911 official called to ask what went wrong and she explained she mistakenly called the number.Nigeria as a country can't boast of any emergency number,and things are so backwardly done around here.This is a series i wouldn't mind continuing..Things can only get better in Nigeria.

Written on Thursday, 11 February 2010 at 13:45 •

As am typing dis,have got a few breath remaining in me.

Went to the market today with my sister for the first time in 7 years.

It was a sunny day,we had to walk and walk.Every1 wanted us to buy stuffs 4rm them.

Afterwards,i had to find my way back to d car to wait for my sister and drop some stuffs in d boot but i missed my way but got through after over 5 minutes of critical thinking...

Written on Saturday, 6 February 2010 at 14:05 •

Love!!!As interesting as it is, tends to fade away.

Love-Cld be gotten 4rm friends.It tends 2 be sweet at d beginning,declines as time goes by,diminishes afterwards.

Believe it or not,no friend will love u as much as ur family will..

Written on Thursday, 18 February 2010 at 17:01 •Dis is one thing i neva wanna talk about cos it infuriates me. Wat does it really mean?

I know dis so called power could open d doors shut at guys to ladies.To increase my temperament the more,the so called power is much talked about than the most vital POWER OF MEN.

The 'power of a woman' has 2b expunged somehow

Written on Tuesday, 2 March 2010 at 17:00 •

1 U cannot touch all ur top teeth wt ur tongue

2 All fools,afta reading the first truth,wil try it

and discover dat d 1st truth is a lie and feel superior because they can do it

3 U're smilin nw because u're a fool

4 You soon wil foward this to anoda fool.

5 There's stil a stupid smile on ur face

Written on Friday, 12 March 2010 at 19:31 •

Wow!!

Can't believe i'd be clockn anoda year 2mrw.

Dis tym 198*,sure ma mum wasn't feeling too well cos of d baby.

And now,d baby is now a MAN.

On d 13th March 198* around 6:30am,a king was born and dat king is Phaljames

Written on Wednesday, 31 March 2010 at 17:22 •

Wow...Where do i start from?

Ok,who's a superstar?

A superstar is som1 who has right about all he needs,fame and can easily get all he doesnt have.Being a superstar isnt devoid of cool cash in d bank also.

A superstar cld update his facebk status wt just a 'FULLSTOP' and have 60 comments on it in 3 minutes.

A superstar has d best of ladies wanting 2 talk 2 him.

A superstar is enviable by all.

One thing dat makes me happy is.....AM GRADUALLY GETTING THERE

Should EASTER be a yearly event?

Written on Monday, 5 April 2010 at 10:30 •

It's another festive season.

A season unlike other seasons.

But my question is.....

Should Easter be a yearly event?

Jesus dies every year,resurrects just bcos of u and i.

To me,aint comfortable with the yearly suffering we make him go through.

I know easter wld remain a yearly event,invariably, dat means JESUS wld keep dying for us till eternity.

Lets know the REASON for the SEASON

The Many Allegations Of Satan

Written on Friday, 30 April 2010 at 10:13 •

Would really take my time in writing this,may be its because have got nothing to do this morning,anyways thank God its friday.

No one likes Satan,so do i.Every1 feels he's behind all the wrong doing(s) in the world,but if am asked i would say he's really not the cause of all the EVIL around us.Ok,a case study is this..

Some1 leaves for the club on a friday nite,gets soooooooo drunk and leaves the club around 2am,had an accident on his way home and dies. Would u say ...

1...Satan pushed him to the club

2...Satan forcefully poured alcohol in his mouth.

Dere are right about so many wrong things we do to HURT ourselves, in otherwords,we do more harm to ourselves than GOOD..Am not disputting the fact that SATAN exists but i do feel BASICALLY, THE SATAN THAT DRIVES US IS US

A certainty in LIFE

Written on Thursday, 31 December 2009 at 13:59 •

Life-Full of d good,d bad,d ugly.

Life-Is spiced with two varieties of people,The Good People & the bad people.

One certainty in Life dat am always scared of is NEMESIS.

The questn is:Why should i do evil wen i knw dat Nemesis would take its rightful place?

Doing good pays because its reward superceeds that of evil.

Lets share luv amongst ourselves.

How to be me!!!

Written on Tuesday, 29 December 2009 at 15:47 •

Be the last born in ur family.

Be the only male child.

Hate lies.

Think b4 u talk,and talk less.

Appreciate pretty ladies.

Make female friends.

Have few friends.

Always go out with ur hankerchief.

And most importantly.....

BE A GENTLEMAN..

Funny sight

Written on Sunday, 17 May 2009 at 08:07 •

Can't seem to stop laughing nw.I woke up quite earlier in d mornin 2 catch a bus goin 2d south-western part of Nigeria from d south southern part.Its a journey dat is minimum of 8hrs.I was stil at d park,all of sudden,a muslim man came in wt a pyjamas worn, set to travel wt us.Dats d funniest sight hav eva seen

Expensive mistakes!!!!

Written on Friday, 6 March 2009 at 17:49 •

I wish little mistakes could b averted in relatnshps, because mistakes cld be avoidable.Little mistakes cld deprive us of our highly cherished possessions(our relatnshps).For a successful relatnshp,lets get immuned against EXPENSIVE LITTLE MISTAKES e.g lies.Lets hav pure,stainless luv 4 one an

I can't believe this!!

Written on Friday, 25 December 2009 at 19:36

Woke

up 10am this morning.

I can't believe i had my bath 2pm today.

I can't believe no friend visited me today.

I can't believe i didn't go visiting anyone either.

I can't believe i didn't cry 4 a new cloth.

Suddenly,it dawned on me that am not getting any younger.

I CAN'T BELIEVE TODAY IS XMAS

Written on Saturday 21st April 2012

What becomes of guys within my age range that sign up on social networking sites for relationships?LOL

The first social networking site I ever signed up on was Hi5.Hi5 looked like the very best until facebook came and swept it away.Afterwards, I saw other social networking sites that looks really cool but was shocked when I came across this particular one.I signed up on this website(name withheld ) and noticed every girl on this website wanted to date or be a friend to grown up men like in their fourties and fifties big enough to be their father .Here is an excerpt of an update from the website:

I want a man between the age range of 40-50 to take me to club tonite…………What are our ladies turning into?

I don’t know if you feel thesame way,but I really do like the fact that I have someone that I call mine.The fact that he/she loves you so much today,doesn’t guarantee the same level of love tomorrow if love which is a very important ingredient isn’t present in a relationship…Not treating him/her well will definitely lead to a decline in love afterwards.I am Likening a relationship to a plant here that needs water[LOVE] to survive..Lets water our relationships

Rate of Suffering in Nigeria

Rate of suffering in Nigeria